hurt me tomorrow – k*naan 

My hair is in a pool of tears by itself. If there’s such a thing as hair heaven, I wouldn’t even need to lead it, it would have found its way already. If I let it, then that’s reparation for my self perpetuated hair injustice. I had a full-on headache a while ago, post new hair cause, now I still have the headache. And I’m very sure I’ll wake tomorrow morning with same headache. 

Why do I keep doing this to myself?

I prepared for myself glaring options for hairstyles yesterday, and last minute I chose to rip that list apart and create new distasteful, unhealthy, unnecessary, wasteful ones. 

I don’t normally come here to beat myself up, but I think in the future I’d like to come back to today so I can give myself a fresh ass whooping if I see this mistake made twice. I’m excruciatingly living through this torture, and no one deserves to do this to themselves. 

One of the reasons people lay up plans is so they have clear pictures of their duties, to effectively allocate time/resources to achieving them. I had 2 whole work-free days after the weekend and I thought, ‘wow! load on, get freaky with yourself. Sleep up. Eat up. Clean up. Get fresh up for the week’ and I got wired up for that. 

My alarm woke me up by the usual 4am, but I didn’t sweat it because it didn’t know any better. I slept back. Woke up later at the proper time, a time workers would ordinarily have so long departed that their scents would have long varnished. Since making good use of the day was on the books, taking off my weaves had to kick off first, so that I could adequately prepoo and proceed with chores while the hair mix settles in. 

That’s where it started wrongly. My plans included my sister meanwhile my sister was unaware. So when I asked that she helped with the hair process, she blew me off. I was so shooked that it got me imploding over the impending damage so much so I figured I needed to calm myself back to the bed for a little more minute to rethink a new process. She having other better things to do meant me keeping my weave on a whole week extra! My natural hair couldn’t have that. It was already begging for a fifth amendment as it was. 

I woke up after what seemed to be about 10mins, when it was really an hour and forty. A little off time track but I knew I could make it up. I have a neighbor on my flat who’s usually willing to help with hair stuffs if called upon, but I detest relishing. She’s younger so I believe she’d always feel constrained to respond positively. But I really needed her to bust me out, so as gutted as I was, I pitched for her. She was glad to help and she did. My angel!

Now that I got the hair out, my day, in my books, just begun. To advance I needed my nappy hair prepooed if I ever had to get them washed that day. I dug for my hair kit to get the tools. I could already see my castor oil at the dresser, so the rest had to be around. At quick glance, the container has the appearance of a reagent bottle,the type laboratory scientists prepare acidic solutions in, the ones with the hideous dark, burnished color (Communication 101 resolves that to be on the same page as you, I call the container dark brown or coffee color. I got you). 

To prepoo I don’t require castor oil, so right then, I didn’t appreciate it all up in my face. Talk about wrong substance right moment. But where was my olive oil? Where was my right substance right moment! It chose then to play games instead? Cool. Lucky for me there was an open window – I could use mum’s, even though hers has been ‘blessed’ for anointing. You know, anointing oil!, so she forbids me wasting it on hair. You should hear the way she spits it, like I use it to grease up a bad zipper or a door handle. But at that moment,she’d left the house, so guess what lucky substance would have a party in my hair! Not her olive oil. It could have been, but I’d have to find it first. And then I got tired of searching. 

My olive oil ❌ Mum’s olive oil ❌ Hope?✔️- coconut oil could suffice! But scratch that. Would have sufficed, if I remembered to replace it after the last wash day I used it up😐

So what did I do next? Just got some conditioner and I let it live in my hair. I only remembered to start shampooing after what seemed like the conditioner delivering babies in my hair. It was that long I kept it on, I must have forgotten. 

Washing the hair hurt. Combing after hurt. Done washing and I couldn’t find the deep conditioner. That’s when it registered on me that the hair devil was onto me. I had to change hair plans instantly. Since I was pulling out a weave, I originally planned for the hair to breathe the entire week, and then make do with wigs. 

But with all that happened, original plan needed to be tweaked – a braid or another weave. I couldn’t decide so I purchased both at the supermarket (braid extensions and weaves). I eventually chose to install weaves. Again. 

Right now, head pains, you cannot imagine😭😭😭

Ps: Hurt Me Tomorrow is a song by KNaan. Pls download and listen to the song. It’s a good song to start the day with. You’ll love it  I promise. 

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